Snack Quest

Have you ever watched "A Charlie Brown Christmas?"

What am I saying? Of *course* you have. *Everyone* has. The only exception to this rule is my boss. Years ago, the "Snoopy Dance" came up in conversation in his office. He asked what the heck we were talking about.

"You know? From 'A Charlie Brown Christmas'?"

::Blank stare from boss::

"Is this something new? You know I don't own a television."

Oh yeah, sure. It's something new—FROM 30 YEARS AGO!

"I was in the Navy then. I didn't have time to watch television."

"But they rerun it every year! How can you not know what we're talking about?" we ask.

On cue, Lamont and I leap from our chairs, start humming the "Linus and Lucy" theme (Duh duh-duh dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah…) and doing the Snoopy Dance, bobbing our heads, jumping from foot to foot and letting our arms hang at our sides.

The boss is dumbfounded. Another person walks into the office and the boss says "I have no idea what they're doing," thinking this is something stupid we've made up on the spur of the moment.

Without missing a beat, the new person looks at us unfazed and asks "Why are they doing the Snoopy Dance?"

But, as Peter David would say, I digress.

So…as a kid, I was obsessed with Peanuts. I had a raggedy old stuffed Snoopy I slept with and took on every trip away from home. I had another smaller family of stuffed Snoopys (Snoopies?) I built a house for in my bookcase. I read all the paperback collections of Peanuts strips I could get my hands on over and over and over. I had a Snoopy lunch box and God only knows what other Peanuts paraphernalia.

And I always got super excited when a Peanuts special was going to air. Remember, this was pre VHS and DVD. The specials aired once a year, and you better damn well catch them.

Aside from the cartoons themselves, one thing in particular fascinated me about Peanuts specials: the ads for Dolly Madison snack cakes. These were not sold in Rhode Island, but I wanted them desperately. If Charlie Brown and Snoopy endorsed them, they must be good.

To this day, I have never seen a Dolly Madison snack cake. Do they really exist? I did a Google search recently and found the parent company, Interstate Bakeries. The Dolly Madison brand is still manufactured but there is no information as to where the elusive cakes are sold.

I e-mailed the company asking for help, and a little less than a week later received a friendly reply saying they were sorry I couldn't find Dolly Madison products in "my area."

"ARRRAGH!" as Charlie Brown would say. Yes, yes, but where *are* they sold????

The e-mail offered the URLS of several Web sites that they thought might carry Dolly Madison products. No luck. Several do carry Hostess products, which are made by the same company, but those are sold in my area and I don't care. I want the Snoopy approved snacks, dammit!

So, my question to you: have you ever seen these sold in your area? If so where is your area? Is it on the planet earth? Could I drive/fly/swim there and buy Dolly Madison cakes? Would it be worth the effort?

Please help.