The Jaunty Hat Hub-Bub
1. Today's post is in the form of a list. Why?
2. Because all the cool kids are doing lists these days.
3. Yes. I would jump off a bridge if all the other kids did.
4. Because I'm a very strong swimmer.
5. Of course, that wouldn't help if there was no water under the bridge.
6. Today, I got to go to the mall all by myself with no children in tow.
7. It was fun.
8. There were a lot of guys at the mall dressed like Turtle from "Entourage."
9. This is not a good look.
10. The husband watched the kids so I could go shopping because he's a nice guy.
11. And I was making him pancakes for dinner. With fruit salad.
12. And bacon.
13. Bacon Ace has never given us any bacon cooking tips, has he?
14. Since we have a Bacon Ace, I wonder if there's a whole Bacon-themed Royal Flush Gang, that goes around committing wacky breakfast meat-related crimes.
15. That would be cool.
16. Especially if they fought the Pancake League of America in a giant frying pan.
17. At the mall, I bought two new pairs of jeans.
18. I may return one of them.
19. Can anyone explain the trend of "whiskering" on jeans?
20. I don't get it. Is it really attractive?
21. I also bought a hat.
22. It is a jaunty hat.
23. The husband laughed when I told him it was jaunty.
24. But he agreed I was right.
25. Probably because he still wanted the pancakes.
26. I hope it gets cold soon, so I can wear my jaunty hat.
27. Good night.
Labels: bacon, Entourage, hub-bub, jaunty hats, pancakes, turtles, whiskering
posted by Lois Lane @ 7:38 PM
15 comments
15 Comments:
I demand a picture of the jaunty hat! (I'll accept a Sketchcast.)
1. I demand a picture of the jeans.
2. And one of 'whiskering' (sounds like it would hurt the inner thigh or something)
3. I like pancakes.
Yaaaaaaay! Jaunty hat picture! Jaunty hat picture! WHISKERING? That sounds like what happened to grandma as she pressed onward in years. Me no want whiskered jeans. Please.
What is "whiskering" on jeans. is this related to Catwoman?
Do you need bacon cooking tips? OK here goes. remove the bacon from the pan before it's "done" to your exact crsiping specifications. the hot grease will continue to cook it as you lay it out on a plate covered with paper towels.
Bacon Royal Flush Gang? I'm on it!
"Whiskering" sounds vaguely naughty.
Or maybe that's just me.
It IS just me? Never mind then, move along, move along, nothing to see here.
Is "whiskering" fashionista speak for "frayed"?
If so, I'm the hippest poster on this blog. Nearly all of my clothing is "whiskered."
I'm the Diana Vreeland of blogdom.
-- Lamont "Fashion Victim" Cranston
P.S. If an Iranian male knows who Diana Vreeland is, does that automatically make him Not Iranian?
1) Cake: Nope, whiskering sounds vaguely naughty to me, too. Yet, it is when: "...permanent creases are created at points where jeans naturally bunch up like in the upper thigh area or along the crotch." Does this mean I need to iron the permanent, fake-nonchalant "bunch up" creases of my whiskered jeans to keep them lookin' bunchy? Blecch!
2) GAH! I don't want my jeans to naturally bunch up, and I don't want them to unnaturally bunch up.
3) Bacon Ace: What is your favorite way to eat bacon? With eggs? BLT? On its own?
4) Lamont: NO! You would have been non-Iranian if you had known what whiskering was. You're 100% Iranian, fella.
I love lists.
You have to wear the jaunty hat at a jaunty angle. It is the law.
As for the bacon grease, you have to fry some bread in it. It is the most delicious fried bread you will ever eat. Grease is good. Arteries love that stuff.
Is there anything bacon grease can't make more delicious?
Didn't think so.
-- Lamont "Honey Cured" Cranston
"3) Bacon Ace: What is your favorite way to eat bacon? With eggs? BLT? On its own?"
That's like asking a parent which is their favorite child. You just don't do that Sparkle.
I'll have to start blogs on my favorite bacon recipies and whatnot.
I like my oldest kid best.
Okay, Mr. Ace! As long as you tell me whether it's a bacon recipe from today or last year, I'll be fine!
Feh, No Oprah. You like the one who gave you chocolate-covered cashews most recently the best.
If the youngest one reads this, he'll get pancakes for supper for sure.
His youngest one probably has more important things to do than listen to the "old folks" prattle online. He shall be pancakeless tonight.
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