Food, Glorious Food

Seen This Morning in the Grocery Store



Mmmmm…you can really taste the zebra!

Random Food Quote #1

I can smell the pretzels just fine, thank you.

Milk Chomp

(from the recipe box of Jak-El)

Ingredients:
Cheerios
Cocoa Puffs
Milk

Directions:
1. Put Cheerios in bowl.
2. Put Cocoa Puffs in bowl
3. Add milk
4. Enjoy.

Random Food Quote #2

You had your chance, but you chose pie instead.

Grrrgh! Arrragh!



In honor of Martin Luther King Jr's birthday, we made a cake. Color choice by Jak-El, theme choice by husband.

Thanks, But My Kids Are Regular Enough.

Woman in Grocery Store Bread Aisle: They keep moving my favorite bread around.

Lois: I think where things go depend on who stocks the shelves.

WIGSBA: Oh, here it is! This is wonderful! (holds up bread) It's got flax seeds and nuts in it. Keeps everything moving, and it tastes good.

Lois: Um, that's nice.

WIGSBA: Try it. I wouldn't steer you wrong.

Lois: Thanks, but I have little children, so I have to buy what they like. (points to loaf of wheat bread in cart)

WIGSBA: Oh, tell them to get over it up and grow up.

Lois: Uh, yeah. I'll do that.

To sum up:
Eating too much flax seed apparently makes you run at the mouth, too.

Random Food Quote #3

There's nothing like hot fat.

And Now I Am Wicked Smaht

Last week was very educational. For example, I learned that:

1. I am famous in Wyoming.

2. This is a really excellent recipe.

3. According to Jak-El, the Eagles will win the Super Bowl. The score will be 60. Obviously, this is going to be a stunning upset. Place your bets now and become rich!

4. Spike and Captain Jack snogging and fighting is pretty hot.

5. In case of emergency, do not call an Olsen twin.

Happy Monday!


I Hope the Wyoming Paparazzi Don't Start Following Me

::phone rings::

Lois: Hello.

Lois's Mom: Hi honey.

Lois: Hi mom.

Mom: I just called to tell you you're famous in Wyoming.

Lois: Huh?

Mom: Your cousin J. said he saw you on TV.

Lois: What?

Mom: Your cousin J. said he saw you on TV.

Lois: No. I heard what you said. I just have no idea what the hell you're talking about.

Mom: J. said he saw you on TV.

Lois: Yes, I get that. On what show does he think he saw me?

Mom: Oh, I have no idea. It was something filmed in Boston last week. Where were you filmed last week?

Lois: Nowhere that I know of.

Mom: But J. said he saw you on TV. And he replayed it and E. watched it too and said he was sure it was you.

Lois: I don't think so.

Mom: But he's sure it was you. Were you speaking somewhere?

Lois: No. I mean, its possible I was shooting my mouth off in public, but I can't imagine why someone would film it, much less show it on television in Wyoming. What show was this on?

Mom: I have no idea. He said you weren't on it for long.

Lois: Tell him to send me an e-mail and tell me what it was on and what it was about. But I'm pretty sure it wasn't me.

Mom: They have some fancy set-up on their television where they can replay things, so they're sure it was you.

Lois: I don't think so.

To sum up:

I'm famous. Someone fetch me a latte.

Another Night at the Algonquin Roundtable

Lois: Trash pick-up is a day late this week because of the holiday.

Husband: What holiday?

Lois: Martin Luther King Jr. Day.

Husband: Asshole.

Lois: That's not very nice, because...um, Martin Luther King died for our sins, you know.

Husband: Exactly. And that has nothing to do with garbage.

::cat walks into room::

Cat: Meow! Meow!

Lois: Oh crap. I still have to feed you guys too.

Cat: Meow!

Lois: Asshole.

Question of the Day

How ya' doin?

Question of the Day, Part 2

Red or Jed?

Question of the Day

Red or white?

Question of the Day

If you could have either (a) an army of the dead, or (b) an army of robots to command, which would you choose and why?

Happy 5th Birthday Jak-El!

Childhood Flashback

Sometimes my job is kinda cool. I just got off the phone from interviewing one of the Lennon Sisters' brothers.

Anyone else spend Saturday nights when they were a kid watching "The Lawrence Welk Show" with their parents and/or grandparents?

Well...gosh.

This site
 compares the GOP presidential candidates to the villains on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

Mitt Romney = Mayor Wilkins

Perfect, isn't it?

My To-Do List for 2008

1. Figure out how to get my picture back on my blog profile. (Was trying to update it and Blogger started being uncooperative. Bah.)

2. Make sure my kids only vomit in places other than my home.

3. Stop dropping David Tennant's name in blog posts for absolutely no reason. Oh, wait. I just did it again, didn't I.



4. Paint Volvo to look like Tardis, which will disguise it so well I'll be able to park anywhere I please.

5. Decide what to have for lunch.