Qualify? Hell, It's Where I Got My Masters!

Found here.


RIP ?????

GUY I’M INTERVIEWING: Do you know Somedude Ineverheardof?

LOIS: No, sorry. Can’t say that I do.

GUY: Wait. I thought your magazine covered XXXXXX.

LOIS: Yes, we do.

GUY: Well, Somedude was a LEGEND in the business.

LOIS: Okay.

GUY: And now he’s DEAD! Do you have the story?

LOIS: When did he die?

GUY: About five years ago.

LOIS: I’ll get right on that.

To sum up:
Send flowers and condolences to: Somedude’s Family, c/o 2003

An Ode to Wednesday

This Just In: The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre Does Torchwood!

Four Hundred and Blueberry Teen

Valentine's Day Smooch-a-Rama!!!

Yesterday was all about the smacking. Today is all about the love.

My list of people who deserve a smooch:

1. The Husband: I'd write something really mushy here that y'all could mock mercilessly, but then I'd have to smack myself. So let's just say I think my hubby is really super and leave it at that.

SMOOCH!

2. Jak-El: My creative, sensitive, silly little man, who I love all the way to the moon and back.

SMOOCH!

3. Dan-El: My hyper little ball of joy who gives great hugs, who I also love all the way to the moon and back.

SMOOCH!

4. The Wonder Cats: You shed, you barf and pee everywhere, but we love you.

SMOOCH!

5. Everyone reading this: Just for being you.

SMOOCH!

And who do you want to send a smooch out to today? (Y'all gotta do your own smoochin', cause my boys get jealous.)


video found via Occasional Superheroine

Wednesday Smackdown!!!!!!

People/Things That Deserved to be Smacked:

1. Comcast: For making me schedule to have a technician to come out to my home, then canceling the damn appointment but not telling me they cancelled the damn appointment.

SMACK!

2. Public Relations People: For pitching me a story, then, when I express interest essentially tell me that, no, sorry, but my magazine isn't important enough for their stinky client to talk to.

SMACK!

3. My Sinuses: 'Cause they hurt, and that's pissing me off.

SMACK!

ouch. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea, given that my sinuses are in my head and all…

4. The Strip on My Parking Pass at the Preschool: Stupid thing just isn't opening the gate.

SMACK!

I'm just getting warmed up. Anything I can smack for y'all?

Sock It To Me

I'm considering giving up on the concept of wearing matching socks. It seems so outdated.

Who decided that socks have to match anyway? Hah! I'm rebelling against this nonsense! Take that, conformists!


(This post is in no way inspired by the fact that I spent way too much time going through two laundry baskets this morning trying to find matching socks for myself and the boys. Well, maybe a little. Okay, maybe a lot.)

And Now For Absolutely No Good Reason...

...other than it's Friday night and Lois has been hitting the infrastructure....David Tennant dancing like a white guy!

Bon weekend, everyone!!!!

May The Force Be With You

::As Lois, Jak-El and Dan-El leave Cousin Steve's Ye Olde Funny Book Shoppe, Jak-El notices the lifesize Yoda statue in the window::

Jak-El: Mom, his light saber isn't lit up.

Lois: That's because he's just posing, not fighting. If anyone attacks the store, it will light up and he'll defend it. Y'know, between Yoda in this window and Green Lantern in the other one, this is probably the safest place in town.

Jak-El: YEAH! Green Lantern has to poop!

Lois: Well...I'm sure even Green Lanterns need to poop sometimes. Do you think Yoda poops?

Jak-El: No. He's a Jedi.

*****

To sum up:
Yoda needs more flax seed in his diet.

The Promised Land?

Last night, I had a dream I went to Canada. (Yes, I’m going to try and obey the 45 second rule.)

In Dream Canada, I stayed at a resort in the woods that was only about a 5 minute drive from a big city. The rental cars were quite small, but instead of parking them, you could fold them down to the size of an umbrella and carry them with you. If you presented your car rental receipt in any bar, you were given two free shots. Dream Canada also had an underground shopping mall, which featured a large Disney Store type shop devoted to some cartoon characters called The Poobs. Their big catch phrase was “No no no….POOB!”

I haven’t been to Canada in quite a while. Aside from the Underground City, which I know is in Montreal, is any of this accurate?

Vote Saxon!

It's Primary Day kids!

If you live in the U.S. of A., get out and cast your vote!

And if you don't live in the U.S., vote twice!

Photo of the Day:


I'm Lois Lane and I approve this message.

Shirts Off, People!

It's time for the Friday Dance Party!!!!!!